The phrase Happy Memorial Day has always seemed wrong to me. How can one be happy to celebrate such an holiday?
People today have forgotten the significance of Memorial Day. For most its become a reason for a 4 day weekend, a Bar-B-Que, a day on the lake and a cold beer.
But for those of us in the military, the reason for this day is more of a reality check.
With the wars and conflict of this last decade, we can't help but feel a cloud over this day. We think about our fallen friends and family on a daily basis, but for this one day the world seems to stop. Some of us will lay wreaths. Some of us will bring flowers. Most of us will weep.
The feeling of sadness for things past, the feeling of fear for things near, and the feeling of grief for things present.
I remember where I was when the plane hit the WTC Towers. I watched the 2nd plane hit live on the news. I remember watching people jump from the buildings, I remember the screams of people on the ground and the black cloud that enveloped the camera crews as people ran for their lives.
I remember where I was when the invasion of Iraq began. I layed in bed, 6 months pregnant with my husband, when they started the "shock and awe" campaign.
I remember where I was when the news of 1st death from our squadron occurred. I was standing in my living room, when my phone rang. Our troop was on their way home after 12 long months. First, we received word of an extension. We were told upto 6 months extra. That the men had been stopped nearly half way through Iraq, when they were ambushed. PFC Hutchins, barely 21 yrs of age was killed. Trying to return home.
I remember the next death, just as well. For sanity's sake I'll keep those details to myself.
Then there was my neighbor, a single mother (I believe she made Sgt) Lynn Jimenez, she left behind a baby boy. Barely 2 yrs old when she left, too young to remember his mother and the sacrifice she made for him.
But the one who really hits home this Memorial Day, was less than a week ago.
PFC Chris Barton.
So this Memorial Day, as you light the grills, drink your beers, and start your boats, remember why you have the ability to do so.
It is the soldier, not the reporter, who has given us freedom of the press.
It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us freedom of speech.
It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who has given us the freedom to demonstrate.
It is the soldier, not the lawyer, who has given us the right to a fair trial.
It is the soldier, who salutes the flag, who serves under the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag,
who allows the protester to burn the flag.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Top 10 List
Top 10 Ways to know if you will fail as an Army Wife:
1. If you've ever been a pole dancer, for any reason other than to feed your children.
2. If you believe wearing Daisy Dukes to a troop function is appropriate.
3. If you think FRG is pronounced furg.
4. If you ever appeared on an episode of COPS?
5. If part of your "dress" up wardrobe contains Booby Tassels.
6. If you think tank tops are sexy.
7. If you believe G.W. Bush was responsible for 9/11, Hurricane Katrina or the recent oil spill. (This also goes for those of you who are thinking "who's GW")
8. If you or your spouse has ever owned a crack pipe.
9. If you believe "Army Wives" is real.
And
10. If your husband goes TDY for 2 days and you spend them crying in the Commander's office.
1. If you've ever been a pole dancer, for any reason other than to feed your children.
2. If you believe wearing Daisy Dukes to a troop function is appropriate.
3. If you think FRG is pronounced furg.
4. If you ever appeared on an episode of COPS?
5. If part of your "dress" up wardrobe contains Booby Tassels.
6. If you think tank tops are sexy.
7. If you believe G.W. Bush was responsible for 9/11, Hurricane Katrina or the recent oil spill. (This also goes for those of you who are thinking "who's GW")
8. If you or your spouse has ever owned a crack pipe.
9. If you believe "Army Wives" is real.
And
10. If your husband goes TDY for 2 days and you spend them crying in the Commander's office.
Friday, May 28, 2010
Army Brats...The Sequel
A childs behavior has a tendency to reflect upon that of the parents. Thats something most of us can agree on. For instance, I have no one to blame but myself, for my childs sarcasm. But I also, have to take credit for my childs ability to know right from wrong. (stay with me I have a point here)
My children know, we don't pick on other kids. They know, they are not to leave the house without my permission,and they know by showing disrespect of any adult the taste of vinegar will follow. However, living in an Army Community, I can't say as all parents agree with this type of "old school" discipline.
I am the first person to say being an Army wife is hard, and the first person to say having children in this life is harder. But when we make the decision to have those children, we are expected to uphold a certain standard. For my current examples we will work only from my current military location. At this post within the last 9 months....
1. Baby approx. 13-14 mos walking down middle of main street while I waited to get my child off bus. Went knocking door to door to find mother. Finally found mother, sleeping in mid day approx 1/8th of mile from location child was found.
2. Baby approx. 11 months in middle of main street, as my car came around the corner I seen her in just enough time to hit the breaks. No parents in sight. Called 911, adults happened to walk outside just before police arrive. I yelled for them to see if they knew who this child belonged to, luck would have it she was theirs. Did not know their child was missing. This time about 1/4 mile from home.
3. 7 yr old girl on bus, picking on another child. This goes on for several min. the boy gets tired of situation, yells at girl and pushes her away. Girl gets off bus, her MOTHER climbs on bus and verbally assaults and threatens harm of boy. (wonder where the child gets it from?)
4. Boy 8 yrs old, picks on my son 4 yrs old. Pushes him down and yells at him. My son proceeds to kick his hiney. Very proud of him at this point.
5. Same boy 8 yrs old, starts a rumor among group of neighborhood boys. Tells them he "made out" with my 6 yr old daughter on the bus. I very calmly talk to parents. Their excuse "uh..I don't know" and shrug their shoulders. (again no wonder their childs a pervert)Now when these little boys start getting curious about sex, who do you think they are going to come to? My daughter has been put into jeopardy because a parent "doesn't know".
These are not isolated events. It is nothing to walk outside and see a dozen children under the age of 10 running around the neighborhood unsupervised. Its rare that you will see a mother anywhere in sight. Some are sleeping, some are just not paying attn, and one even goes to work and leaves her 8 yr old at home alone.
What's really funny about most of these situations, is when something does happen to these children, everybody is so shocked. What do you expect to happen, when you have a child, ignore them when they act like fools, and get so wrapped up in yourself you don't know where your child is, let alone what they are doing?
Being an Army Brat is hard enough. These kids have to grow up fast enough from Army life. Why double that pressure on them? The local highschools have had to add numerous pregnancy programs. In one highschool in the 8th grade class alone, there were more than 6 pregnancies all military children. On this post, there were numerous home invasions and burglaries, turns out military children. Violence is more than rampant. Pre-teen/teen boys think its ok to hit their girlfriends. Their mothers excuse "he has a problem dealing with his emotions".
Army wives have gotten lazy when it comes to their children. We are held to a higher standard, its time we achieve that standard.
We are Army Wives for goodness sake. Stand up and act like it!
My children know, we don't pick on other kids. They know, they are not to leave the house without my permission,and they know by showing disrespect of any adult the taste of vinegar will follow. However, living in an Army Community, I can't say as all parents agree with this type of "old school" discipline.
I am the first person to say being an Army wife is hard, and the first person to say having children in this life is harder. But when we make the decision to have those children, we are expected to uphold a certain standard. For my current examples we will work only from my current military location. At this post within the last 9 months....
1. Baby approx. 13-14 mos walking down middle of main street while I waited to get my child off bus. Went knocking door to door to find mother. Finally found mother, sleeping in mid day approx 1/8th of mile from location child was found.
2. Baby approx. 11 months in middle of main street, as my car came around the corner I seen her in just enough time to hit the breaks. No parents in sight. Called 911, adults happened to walk outside just before police arrive. I yelled for them to see if they knew who this child belonged to, luck would have it she was theirs. Did not know their child was missing. This time about 1/4 mile from home.
3. 7 yr old girl on bus, picking on another child. This goes on for several min. the boy gets tired of situation, yells at girl and pushes her away. Girl gets off bus, her MOTHER climbs on bus and verbally assaults and threatens harm of boy. (wonder where the child gets it from?)
4. Boy 8 yrs old, picks on my son 4 yrs old. Pushes him down and yells at him. My son proceeds to kick his hiney. Very proud of him at this point.
5. Same boy 8 yrs old, starts a rumor among group of neighborhood boys. Tells them he "made out" with my 6 yr old daughter on the bus. I very calmly talk to parents. Their excuse "uh..I don't know" and shrug their shoulders. (again no wonder their childs a pervert)Now when these little boys start getting curious about sex, who do you think they are going to come to? My daughter has been put into jeopardy because a parent "doesn't know".
These are not isolated events. It is nothing to walk outside and see a dozen children under the age of 10 running around the neighborhood unsupervised. Its rare that you will see a mother anywhere in sight. Some are sleeping, some are just not paying attn, and one even goes to work and leaves her 8 yr old at home alone.
What's really funny about most of these situations, is when something does happen to these children, everybody is so shocked. What do you expect to happen, when you have a child, ignore them when they act like fools, and get so wrapped up in yourself you don't know where your child is, let alone what they are doing?
Being an Army Brat is hard enough. These kids have to grow up fast enough from Army life. Why double that pressure on them? The local highschools have had to add numerous pregnancy programs. In one highschool in the 8th grade class alone, there were more than 6 pregnancies all military children. On this post, there were numerous home invasions and burglaries, turns out military children. Violence is more than rampant. Pre-teen/teen boys think its ok to hit their girlfriends. Their mothers excuse "he has a problem dealing with his emotions".
Army wives have gotten lazy when it comes to their children. We are held to a higher standard, its time we achieve that standard.
We are Army Wives for goodness sake. Stand up and act like it!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Ultimate Sacrifice
The view people have of me, is subjective to how well you know me. I've been told I'm everything from heartless to fearless. People don't understand why I am the way I am. How I shut things off and think the way I do. Its simple actually. I do it because I must. The pain of Army life can be overwhelming, the following is a prime example as to why.
Less than 72 hours ago, PFC. Chris Barton assigned to 3rd platoon, Shadow Company 1-33 Cav with the 101st Airborne Div was killed in the line of Duty. He left behind his family, friends and soldiers. The grief that they feel affects us all. He was stationed in Afghanistan, and barely out of basic. When any soldier dies, its painful. But when a Private First Class gives his life its unbearable.
PFC Barton was not the first and sadly he will not be the last. As a wife, we hear rumors of something happening. But we do not have a name. So we sit by our doors and wait to see if the are coming to us. We check our windows and peepholes before we answer the door, to ensure the person on the other side isn't in uniform. We know once we see that dress uniform our life as we knew it is over. We have to tell our children their daddy won't be coming back. We have to tell our in-laws their sons died so someone else didn't have to. We have to live with the guilt and nightmares of knowing what our spouses, friends, brothers, sisters or parent endured on their last moments.
I am not a war protestor, I fully believe what these men and women are doing in the Middle East. I will not let them die in vain.
Thank you PFC Chris Barton, you will not be forgotten.
Less than 72 hours ago, PFC. Chris Barton assigned to 3rd platoon, Shadow Company 1-33 Cav with the 101st Airborne Div was killed in the line of Duty. He left behind his family, friends and soldiers. The grief that they feel affects us all. He was stationed in Afghanistan, and barely out of basic. When any soldier dies, its painful. But when a Private First Class gives his life its unbearable.
PFC Barton was not the first and sadly he will not be the last. As a wife, we hear rumors of something happening. But we do not have a name. So we sit by our doors and wait to see if the are coming to us. We check our windows and peepholes before we answer the door, to ensure the person on the other side isn't in uniform. We know once we see that dress uniform our life as we knew it is over. We have to tell our children their daddy won't be coming back. We have to tell our in-laws their sons died so someone else didn't have to. We have to live with the guilt and nightmares of knowing what our spouses, friends, brothers, sisters or parent endured on their last moments.
I am not a war protestor, I fully believe what these men and women are doing in the Middle East. I will not let them die in vain.
Thank you PFC Chris Barton, you will not be forgotten.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Army Wife Slogans
Life in the military makes you familiar with the various unit/branch slogans.
Such as the Marine Corp's "Semper Fi", 2nd ACR "Toujour Pret", and "Ne Desit Virtus" ("Let Valor Not Fail") and my favorite "Ranger On". One lesser known slogan is among the Army wives themselves.
My French is a little rusty but the slogan is this: "Mettez vos culottes grande fille et s'en occuper"
Roughly translated it means: Put on your big girl panties and deal with it!
(what did you expect something profound?)
Army wives are faced with enormous difficulty. Unfortunately, we can't solve all of our problems in less than an hour with commerical breaks for Tampex, Midol and Cialis. When our husbands deploy, go TDY or just simply to the field, chaos is sure to follow.
Our cars breakdown, our children get sick, and there seems to always be some sort of natural disaster. Since my husband deployed this last time (4 months ago), so far we've had multiple trips to the ER, 2 tornadoes, a flooded home, 2 Extremely ill parents, a rash of burglaries and an psychotic racoon living in my garage.
My new "pet" is apparently big enough to move a flak vest, and scare off 2 pest control men. One of which dropped of a cage and said he'd be right back. That was a month ago. One can only assume he's entered into some sort of witness protection program.
When things of this nature happen, we can sit down, cry and yell at whom ever is willing to listen. Or we can put on our big girl panties. I'll be the first to admit, this is easier said then done. There have been times, I've wanted to strangle someone with those panties instead of wearing them. However, logic sets in and I will typically realize the only thing that will get me is a visit from the MPs and a whole lot of paperwork done in my newly bared ass.
So the moral of todays blog...Being an Army wife, means not showing your ass. (unless they really deserve it, of course)
Such as the Marine Corp's "Semper Fi", 2nd ACR "Toujour Pret", and "Ne Desit Virtus" ("Let Valor Not Fail") and my favorite "Ranger On". One lesser known slogan is among the Army wives themselves.
My French is a little rusty but the slogan is this: "Mettez vos culottes grande fille et s'en occuper"
Roughly translated it means: Put on your big girl panties and deal with it!
(what did you expect something profound?)
Army wives are faced with enormous difficulty. Unfortunately, we can't solve all of our problems in less than an hour with commerical breaks for Tampex, Midol and Cialis. When our husbands deploy, go TDY or just simply to the field, chaos is sure to follow.
Our cars breakdown, our children get sick, and there seems to always be some sort of natural disaster. Since my husband deployed this last time (4 months ago), so far we've had multiple trips to the ER, 2 tornadoes, a flooded home, 2 Extremely ill parents, a rash of burglaries and an psychotic racoon living in my garage.
My new "pet" is apparently big enough to move a flak vest, and scare off 2 pest control men. One of which dropped of a cage and said he'd be right back. That was a month ago. One can only assume he's entered into some sort of witness protection program.
When things of this nature happen, we can sit down, cry and yell at whom ever is willing to listen. Or we can put on our big girl panties. I'll be the first to admit, this is easier said then done. There have been times, I've wanted to strangle someone with those panties instead of wearing them. However, logic sets in and I will typically realize the only thing that will get me is a visit from the MPs and a whole lot of paperwork done in my newly bared ass.
So the moral of todays blog...Being an Army wife, means not showing your ass. (unless they really deserve it, of course)
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Universal Healthcare??
In the Army world, we have our Tricare insurance to cover all of our medical needs. This is the biggest selling point for enlistment into the US Army. Being a mother of 3 small children,(one who fully believes himself to be a Ninja Turtle) one can quickly realize the value of health insurance.
However, once dealing with Tricare for so many years, one starts to wonder if putting the government in charge of all healthcare is the most "intelligent" option.
Don't get me wrong, I feel blessed to have healthcare. I don't believe anyone should go without proper care. But....
For us, if you choose the Tricare Prime option, (which you do if you live on/near post) all of your medical needs are met via the Army Community Hospital. This is typically convenient, but not always the best option.
Army Surgeons/Physicians are the best in the world. They are trained to do unthinkable things under great deals of pressure. So for the most part, I would choose an Army Surgeon/Doctor over a civilian any day. With the growth of the Army family, there just aren't enough Army Drs to go around. It is nothing to wait over a month for an appointment. So to handle the overflow they bring in Civilian doctors.
So we've gone from having the best healthcare in the world, to being treated by the lowest bidder. If you do not DEMAND to see an Army Physician you will typically be assigned to either an open civilian, a Family Care Nurse, or a Physicians Assistant.
This can leave a lot of loopholes in healthcare.
For ex: my son, has apparently had the same head cold for 5 yrs now.
The next problem, is we don't always see the same physician. We may see an Army Dr. today, a civilian dr for our follow up and a Family Care nurse for lab results.
Now I will give Tricare credit, for the attempt to rectify this situation. They have instituted a Primary Care Manager "program". This is just what it sounds like. You are assigned a Dr, nurse, or PA that you are to see on every visit. The problem with this is, its the military. People come and go on a daily basis. That Dr. you see today, may be in Afghanistan tomorrow.
So if our government has so many issues handling just the military, how are they going to handle civilians as well?
So my thought is this...since Army Doctors/Surgeons are the best, maybe we should start training civilian doctors under a hail of gunfire. Once a physician can prove he can remove a bullet, from a femoral artery using a pair of tweezers, a stick of gum and a bottle of Jack Daniels he can move on to the next phase of employment.
We need all the MacGuyver's we can rush through Med School.
However, once dealing with Tricare for so many years, one starts to wonder if putting the government in charge of all healthcare is the most "intelligent" option.
Don't get me wrong, I feel blessed to have healthcare. I don't believe anyone should go without proper care. But....
For us, if you choose the Tricare Prime option, (which you do if you live on/near post) all of your medical needs are met via the Army Community Hospital. This is typically convenient, but not always the best option.
Army Surgeons/Physicians are the best in the world. They are trained to do unthinkable things under great deals of pressure. So for the most part, I would choose an Army Surgeon/Doctor over a civilian any day. With the growth of the Army family, there just aren't enough Army Drs to go around. It is nothing to wait over a month for an appointment. So to handle the overflow they bring in Civilian doctors.
So we've gone from having the best healthcare in the world, to being treated by the lowest bidder. If you do not DEMAND to see an Army Physician you will typically be assigned to either an open civilian, a Family Care Nurse, or a Physicians Assistant.
This can leave a lot of loopholes in healthcare.
For ex: my son, has apparently had the same head cold for 5 yrs now.
The next problem, is we don't always see the same physician. We may see an Army Dr. today, a civilian dr for our follow up and a Family Care nurse for lab results.
Now I will give Tricare credit, for the attempt to rectify this situation. They have instituted a Primary Care Manager "program". This is just what it sounds like. You are assigned a Dr, nurse, or PA that you are to see on every visit. The problem with this is, its the military. People come and go on a daily basis. That Dr. you see today, may be in Afghanistan tomorrow.
So if our government has so many issues handling just the military, how are they going to handle civilians as well?
So my thought is this...since Army Doctors/Surgeons are the best, maybe we should start training civilian doctors under a hail of gunfire. Once a physician can prove he can remove a bullet, from a femoral artery using a pair of tweezers, a stick of gum and a bottle of Jack Daniels he can move on to the next phase of employment.
We need all the MacGuyver's we can rush through Med School.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Very Stereotypical of You.
One of the biggest stereotypes of the Army spouse, is that we all come from some backwoods podunk trailer park. One would think, none of us have an education beyond middle school and wear daisy dukes like they are high fashion. This is simply not true. FOR MOST OF US.
Unfortunately it only takes few to make a stereotype stick.
As I was in Wal-Mart today. (you don't have to be a trailer dweller to shop there!), I noticed the Creme de la Creme of Army wife stereotypes. She was sitting outside the Wal-Mart branch of McDonalds, crying. I noticed a young soldier, kneeling down in front of her. Whispering something, "heroic" in an attempt to calm her fears.
At first I thought, he was proposing and a small giggle came popping out. What says romance like a Wal-Mart McDonalds proposal?
As I got a little closer, (nosier) I realized he was saying, "its alright, its alright" This of course got my attn, until I noticed she was holding her belly. Immediately I noticed the fear on her face as I heard her pronounce, "she's not been moving". Any woman who's ever been pregnant has gone through this scare, the fear that something is wrong. So naturally I wanted to jump in to assist. But before I could the story takes an unusual turn.
The soldier still attempting to calm her fears, proclaims.."its ok, its too early to feel movement". This was apparently the wrong statement for him to make.
He barely gets the words out of his mouth, and its like the trailer door was swung open!Ellie Mae comes out swinging~~
The momentarily fearful momma to be, jumps up in her multicolored tank top and shorty shorts and yells. YA'LL JUST DON'T GET IT, I'MA FACING 25 TO LIFE!!!
Now, the fact that most people didn't even flinch at this statement, says a lot. I could never imagine a civilian world, where this statement would go unnoticed.
So you walk away, leaving that mess for the professionals. While wondering, what she had done to end up in this situation. Various scenarios went through my head. Possibly a botched liquor store robbery, a basement full of dead bodies?, maybe government espionage? (somehow I doubt this one)But whatever it was she better stock up on her Marlboro's now. I'd hate to be 9 months pregnant in a Federal "facility", without any smokes to call ma old man.
Unfortunately it only takes few to make a stereotype stick.
As I was in Wal-Mart today. (you don't have to be a trailer dweller to shop there!), I noticed the Creme de la Creme of Army wife stereotypes. She was sitting outside the Wal-Mart branch of McDonalds, crying. I noticed a young soldier, kneeling down in front of her. Whispering something, "heroic" in an attempt to calm her fears.
At first I thought, he was proposing and a small giggle came popping out. What says romance like a Wal-Mart McDonalds proposal?
As I got a little closer, (nosier) I realized he was saying, "its alright, its alright" This of course got my attn, until I noticed she was holding her belly. Immediately I noticed the fear on her face as I heard her pronounce, "she's not been moving". Any woman who's ever been pregnant has gone through this scare, the fear that something is wrong. So naturally I wanted to jump in to assist. But before I could the story takes an unusual turn.
The soldier still attempting to calm her fears, proclaims.."its ok, its too early to feel movement". This was apparently the wrong statement for him to make.
He barely gets the words out of his mouth, and its like the trailer door was swung open!Ellie Mae comes out swinging~~
The momentarily fearful momma to be, jumps up in her multicolored tank top and shorty shorts and yells. YA'LL JUST DON'T GET IT, I'MA FACING 25 TO LIFE!!!
Now, the fact that most people didn't even flinch at this statement, says a lot. I could never imagine a civilian world, where this statement would go unnoticed.
So you walk away, leaving that mess for the professionals. While wondering, what she had done to end up in this situation. Various scenarios went through my head. Possibly a botched liquor store robbery, a basement full of dead bodies?, maybe government espionage? (somehow I doubt this one)But whatever it was she better stock up on her Marlboro's now. I'd hate to be 9 months pregnant in a Federal "facility", without any smokes to call ma old man.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
23 O'Clock
One of the biggest issues for me in regards to the Army was the telling of time. Truth be told, it still is.
We wake at 600 hrs, not 6 am. We go to bed at 2300 hours not 11pm. Its all very confusing for anyone who learned to tell time the "civilian" way.
For the first several years of my "military" experience, the embarrassment of asking was a bit larger than being late for something. I thought I was doomed to a life of timeline insecurity. I was watching a re-run of Tool Time, when it finally set in.
In this episode, Jill's father was a retired service member, and Tim had the same issue I was having. She was explaining to Tim, that if it is after noon, you add 12 hours to the number. Ex: 1pm is 1300. The opposite is true when converting. Ex: 2400 hrs (-12) is midnight.(who says you don't learn anything from tv)
So at that very moment a lightbulb went off in my head. Screw math. Its all way too much trouble, I'll memorize the clock. If that doesn't work, cell phones and wrist watches now have time converters.
My husband still makes fun of me for my inablity to tell time. I'll occassionally catch myself adding an O'clock to the time, or asking if its am or pm. After all these years, you'd think I'd know its 2000 hours and not 20 O'clock. Apparently not.
I still show up late for appts because my watch does not have a 15.
My husband still gets irritated when he says be ready by 1700 and at 5 pm, I think I still have another hour.
So to wrap up tonight, its almost 2100 hours, so by MY calculations I should have been in be 10 hours ago.
We wake at 600 hrs, not 6 am. We go to bed at 2300 hours not 11pm. Its all very confusing for anyone who learned to tell time the "civilian" way.
For the first several years of my "military" experience, the embarrassment of asking was a bit larger than being late for something. I thought I was doomed to a life of timeline insecurity. I was watching a re-run of Tool Time, when it finally set in.
In this episode, Jill's father was a retired service member, and Tim had the same issue I was having. She was explaining to Tim, that if it is after noon, you add 12 hours to the number. Ex: 1pm is 1300. The opposite is true when converting. Ex: 2400 hrs (-12) is midnight.(who says you don't learn anything from tv)
So at that very moment a lightbulb went off in my head. Screw math. Its all way too much trouble, I'll memorize the clock. If that doesn't work, cell phones and wrist watches now have time converters.
My husband still makes fun of me for my inablity to tell time. I'll occassionally catch myself adding an O'clock to the time, or asking if its am or pm. After all these years, you'd think I'd know its 2000 hours and not 20 O'clock. Apparently not.
I still show up late for appts because my watch does not have a 15.
My husband still gets irritated when he says be ready by 1700 and at 5 pm, I think I still have another hour.
So to wrap up tonight, its almost 2100 hours, so by MY calculations I should have been in be 10 hours ago.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
HomoeusMilitarius
One of the biggest debates regarding the military, is the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. A lot of people misunderstand this policy. Homosexuality is still not allowed in the US Military. The policy just states, you can't be asked about it, keep your bedroom private and you'll be fine.
Being an Army wife, when this subject arises,this question never fails:
Well you're an Army wife, what do you think about Gays in the Army?
There are several things wrong with this question:
1. My opinion isn't any more important than anyone else, who doesn't go to war.
2.(The biggest)Even though I am an Army wife, I don't have weekly sitdowns with Congress like people seem to believe we do. I don't call the White House and ask to schedule time with President Obama, and I doubt he really wants to hear my opinion on any subject, let alone this one.
My personal opinion on this subject, is pretty simple. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO IN YOUR BEDROOM. KEEP IT IN YOUR BEDROOM. I couldn't care less, who sticks what where.
Some people are into feet, some people are into leather, I don't care. You can be worshipping the Norse God of Goat Herders and its NONE of my business.
A soldier should get up in the morning, put on his/her uniform and do their job. Not advertise their sexual preference.
There is no room in the military for sex, just ask any wife of a deployed soldier!
Now with that being said, I do think there is some credibility for putting homosexuals and women on the front lines. Take Iraq for example. We could have already blown it up, torn it down, rebuilt and redecorated by now. Take away our
M-16s and give us some swatches. We're gonna make this place SPARKLE!!!
Being an Army wife, when this subject arises,this question never fails:
Well you're an Army wife, what do you think about Gays in the Army?
There are several things wrong with this question:
1. My opinion isn't any more important than anyone else, who doesn't go to war.
2.(The biggest)Even though I am an Army wife, I don't have weekly sitdowns with Congress like people seem to believe we do. I don't call the White House and ask to schedule time with President Obama, and I doubt he really wants to hear my opinion on any subject, let alone this one.
My personal opinion on this subject, is pretty simple. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO IN YOUR BEDROOM. KEEP IT IN YOUR BEDROOM. I couldn't care less, who sticks what where.
Some people are into feet, some people are into leather, I don't care. You can be worshipping the Norse God of Goat Herders and its NONE of my business.
A soldier should get up in the morning, put on his/her uniform and do their job. Not advertise their sexual preference.
There is no room in the military for sex, just ask any wife of a deployed soldier!
Now with that being said, I do think there is some credibility for putting homosexuals and women on the front lines. Take Iraq for example. We could have already blown it up, torn it down, rebuilt and redecorated by now. Take away our
M-16s and give us some swatches. We're gonna make this place SPARKLE!!!
Friday, May 21, 2010
Mafia style!
You hear tell of how strong one must be to fully handle the life of an Army wife. The constant pull of insanity can wear on a persons very fiber. As Army wive's we know if we don't work together we will not make it. As women we have a tendency to be a bit hateful towards other women. But as Army wives, we have no choice but to put that stupidity aside and hold each other up.
So with that being said....when somebody hurts one of us, they should probably take caution. There is a bond all Army wives share. Its stronger than any sorority, group or in some instances, family. Each of us know what we sign up for when we marry a soldier. For the most part we expect a struggle of some sort. However, that can only take us so far.
When we are pushed to the edge, we have to make a choice. We can either fall, jump or fight.
If we fall, its like saying the other person wins. Army wives rarely take this approach. Those who do, probably weren't cut out for this life.
If we jump, its implying we made the choice to let you win. Still not the best option. But sometimes you work with what you have.
Most of us will fall into the later category, fight.
Ticking off a single Army wife, seems harmless enough. But what people fail to remember, is we travel in troops.
You can tell a lot about a wife, by asking which troop she belongs. This works like a ranking system for an Army Wife Fight Club. Those who belong to a troop will always remain a member even when they are taken from us and put into a "lesser" troop. (Yes I said it!)
In general, this is how it works....
Idiot A, will do something to Army Wife #1 (it can be something as simple as a late payment or something as large as failing to purchase a home after stating in writing this is their intention and instead of being a decent person, defaults). *specific enough?*
This Army wife, calls #2. Who in turn calls wife #3 and so on. Eventually it is relayed to our fearless leader, who will either pretend she didn't hear it or drive the get away car. (like how I threw you in there)
So a situation that could have easily been avoided, has now turned into a troop smackdown. Once the "phone tree" is activated, we turn into the Soprano's. Occasionally, we may even get help from another "family". But that of course, involves permission from another fearless leader and it can get messy from there. So we'll just leave that alone for now.
So the moral of this story...don't piss us off. Doing so, may end up getting you a new pair of concrete combat boots.
So with that being said....when somebody hurts one of us, they should probably take caution. There is a bond all Army wives share. Its stronger than any sorority, group or in some instances, family. Each of us know what we sign up for when we marry a soldier. For the most part we expect a struggle of some sort. However, that can only take us so far.
When we are pushed to the edge, we have to make a choice. We can either fall, jump or fight.
If we fall, its like saying the other person wins. Army wives rarely take this approach. Those who do, probably weren't cut out for this life.
If we jump, its implying we made the choice to let you win. Still not the best option. But sometimes you work with what you have.
Most of us will fall into the later category, fight.
Ticking off a single Army wife, seems harmless enough. But what people fail to remember, is we travel in troops.
You can tell a lot about a wife, by asking which troop she belongs. This works like a ranking system for an Army Wife Fight Club. Those who belong to a troop will always remain a member even when they are taken from us and put into a "lesser" troop. (Yes I said it!)
In general, this is how it works....
Idiot A, will do something to Army Wife #1 (it can be something as simple as a late payment or something as large as failing to purchase a home after stating in writing this is their intention and instead of being a decent person, defaults). *specific enough?*
This Army wife, calls #2. Who in turn calls wife #3 and so on. Eventually it is relayed to our fearless leader, who will either pretend she didn't hear it or drive the get away car. (like how I threw you in there)
So a situation that could have easily been avoided, has now turned into a troop smackdown. Once the "phone tree" is activated, we turn into the Soprano's. Occasionally, we may even get help from another "family". But that of course, involves permission from another fearless leader and it can get messy from there. So we'll just leave that alone for now.
So the moral of this story...don't piss us off. Doing so, may end up getting you a new pair of concrete combat boots.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Another pitfall of military life is communication. After you are involved with the military, speaking in acronyms becomes a way of life.
The Army has an acronym for everything. Civilians typically look at us like we're speaking a foreign language, which in essence maybe we are. Its not something we do consciously, its just something we do.
Like a hillbilly who adds ya'll to every sentence, the soldier will add something such as SNAFU. Or my personal favorite, FUBAR. Now most of these you can tell what they mean by context, by looking at the letters, or watching an old Army movie.
But what about those other less fun acronyms. Such as MOS,BDU,ACU,SOP,BAH and even FU. Don't get to excited, it doesn't mean what you think it does.
MOS: Military Operational Speciality. For some reason JOB seems too difficult.
BDU: Battle(or basic depending on who you're talking to) Dress Uniform. These were the standard until we started with the ACU.
ACU: Army Combat Uniform. This uniform change was what I believe to be the beginning of the "new" army. Undisciplined and falling apart. This would be the uniform you see now a days with the computer pixel design that wear like pajamas. If they put a bunny on the front of the combat boot, the uniform would be perfect.
SOP: Standard Operation Procedure, or laymans terms: Same old poop
BAH: Standard Allowance of Housing. This is simply a rent payment.
FU: Fire Unit, doesn't have a lot of applications to daily conversation, but it is fun to say!
So basically, almost any term you use on an Army post is going to be an acronym somehow. In the Army if we have the chance we will take something of ease and turn it into a total SNAFU.
My MOS is that of a military spouse, and my dependents are lacking formation. Our SOP is that I go in the playroom to see TARFU. What they've done in there is my best SWAG.
Before its over I may have to contact the MPs, ACS, AER and maybe FU(see its fun to say)
Screw it I'm going to AAFES. HOOAH!
The Army has an acronym for everything. Civilians typically look at us like we're speaking a foreign language, which in essence maybe we are. Its not something we do consciously, its just something we do.
Like a hillbilly who adds ya'll to every sentence, the soldier will add something such as SNAFU. Or my personal favorite, FUBAR. Now most of these you can tell what they mean by context, by looking at the letters, or watching an old Army movie.
But what about those other less fun acronyms. Such as MOS,BDU,ACU,SOP,BAH and even FU. Don't get to excited, it doesn't mean what you think it does.
MOS: Military Operational Speciality. For some reason JOB seems too difficult.
BDU: Battle(or basic depending on who you're talking to) Dress Uniform. These were the standard until we started with the ACU.
ACU: Army Combat Uniform. This uniform change was what I believe to be the beginning of the "new" army. Undisciplined and falling apart. This would be the uniform you see now a days with the computer pixel design that wear like pajamas. If they put a bunny on the front of the combat boot, the uniform would be perfect.
SOP: Standard Operation Procedure, or laymans terms: Same old poop
BAH: Standard Allowance of Housing. This is simply a rent payment.
FU: Fire Unit, doesn't have a lot of applications to daily conversation, but it is fun to say!
So basically, almost any term you use on an Army post is going to be an acronym somehow. In the Army if we have the chance we will take something of ease and turn it into a total SNAFU.
My MOS is that of a military spouse, and my dependents are lacking formation. Our SOP is that I go in the playroom to see TARFU. What they've done in there is my best SWAG.
Before its over I may have to contact the MPs, ACS, AER and maybe FU(see its fun to say)
Screw it I'm going to AAFES. HOOAH!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Celibacy For Freedom Campaign
Everyone knows the life of an Army spouse call be full of loneliness and even despair. From the moment you say I Do, you get a dose of reality. There's a saying in the military, "If the Army wanted you to have a wife, they'd issue you one".
That is the honest to goodness truth. I've always envisioned, a platoon of new recruits, standing in line for their uniforms, boots, and wives. With the past decade, came new wars. We've seen multiple deployments and causalties, both on the war front and the home front. So I started thinking....
All wars and battles fought by our men/women in uniform, get their own hi-speed name.
Well as an Army wife, I'm tired of being left out!
I'm having trouble deciding between:
Operation: Celibacy, Enduring Operation Celibacy and The Celibacy for Freedom Campaign.
Being an Army wife should come with certain benefits, it definitely comes with battle scars. Personally I think we should qualify for PTSD treatment.
PTSD: Pretty Tired of Sex Deprivement, perhaps?
Now, don't get me wrong. I do NOT advocate the adulterous behavior that could cure such a condition. I'm just saying, if the Army were to provide us with a cabana boy our divorce rates may be a little lower.
As what I believe to be a cruel joke, they do provide us with Gardners. Typically, non English speaking, hygenically challenged, "Oh Lord, please don't come back and kill me in my sleep" gardners. I truly believe this is done for a purpose.
You will never see a Desperate Housewife's gardner on an Army post. Why?.. because we would no longer be desperate.
So until our husbands return, we should wear Troop TShirts proclaiming....
REMAINING CELIBATE FOR YOUR FREEDOM
SINCE 20XX
That is the honest to goodness truth. I've always envisioned, a platoon of new recruits, standing in line for their uniforms, boots, and wives. With the past decade, came new wars. We've seen multiple deployments and causalties, both on the war front and the home front. So I started thinking....
All wars and battles fought by our men/women in uniform, get their own hi-speed name.
Well as an Army wife, I'm tired of being left out!
I'm having trouble deciding between:
Operation: Celibacy, Enduring Operation Celibacy and The Celibacy for Freedom Campaign.
Being an Army wife should come with certain benefits, it definitely comes with battle scars. Personally I think we should qualify for PTSD treatment.
PTSD: Pretty Tired of Sex Deprivement, perhaps?
Now, don't get me wrong. I do NOT advocate the adulterous behavior that could cure such a condition. I'm just saying, if the Army were to provide us with a cabana boy our divorce rates may be a little lower.
As what I believe to be a cruel joke, they do provide us with Gardners. Typically, non English speaking, hygenically challenged, "Oh Lord, please don't come back and kill me in my sleep" gardners. I truly believe this is done for a purpose.
You will never see a Desperate Housewife's gardner on an Army post. Why?.. because we would no longer be desperate.
So until our husbands return, we should wear Troop TShirts proclaiming....
REMAINING CELIBATE FOR YOUR FREEDOM
SINCE 20XX
Monday, May 17, 2010
Family Readiness
Anyone who's ever seen an episode of Army Wives has heard of the Family Readiness Group. The FRG's most basic function is to help "promote" the family unit, specifically during time of deployments. It is of course, more complicated than that, but for tonights purposes we'll stick with basics.
Being involved in the FRG can be frustrating, for even the most experienced spouses.
Its rare that you will find one who is up to the task. I'm not knocking those who try, I'm just stating it is a difficult job.
The FRG leader will typically end up with a feeling she has joined the "Army of One", and end up feeling let down, even disappointed. When we do find that fearless leader who can guide us through a deployment, it is almost inevitable she will be transferred to another troop or another base entirely. (told you I'd give you a shout out, lol)This can basically reset the entire FRG. All progress made is gone.
Once a month, the present family members, will be summoned to a meeting. This is where TV gets it wrong (in every aspect). If we were all as excited about the FRG meetings as it would appear on television, the world would be perfect. The total attendance at a typical FRG meeting is less than 5. Those are typically the newer spouses or the ones that have made friends with the leader and show as a sign of support. Or the ones like me, who go to make sure they aren't the ones being talked about. (We're women. If you aren't there, we're gonna talk about you!)
As for when attendance is at its best, you may find yourself wishing, everyone stayed home.
When you get a group of women together it can be chaotic. When you get a group of disgruntled women who haven't seen their husband in 6 months, it can be cataclysmic.
Running an FRG meeting can be equated to herding cats in heat, who have been dunked in a bathtub. No matter what the issue, the problem is somehow the fault of the FRG leader. She apparently wears an invisible cape, is intended to fly at lightning speed, and willing to fight all of the worlds evils.
The FRG is a necessity, but it is only as good as you make it. Keep in mind, it is a volunteer position. If one thinks they can be the next Claudia Joy, they are typically more than welcome to make an attempt.
Being involved in the FRG can be frustrating, for even the most experienced spouses.
Its rare that you will find one who is up to the task. I'm not knocking those who try, I'm just stating it is a difficult job.
The FRG leader will typically end up with a feeling she has joined the "Army of One", and end up feeling let down, even disappointed. When we do find that fearless leader who can guide us through a deployment, it is almost inevitable she will be transferred to another troop or another base entirely. (told you I'd give you a shout out, lol)This can basically reset the entire FRG. All progress made is gone.
Once a month, the present family members, will be summoned to a meeting. This is where TV gets it wrong (in every aspect). If we were all as excited about the FRG meetings as it would appear on television, the world would be perfect. The total attendance at a typical FRG meeting is less than 5. Those are typically the newer spouses or the ones that have made friends with the leader and show as a sign of support. Or the ones like me, who go to make sure they aren't the ones being talked about. (We're women. If you aren't there, we're gonna talk about you!)
As for when attendance is at its best, you may find yourself wishing, everyone stayed home.
When you get a group of women together it can be chaotic. When you get a group of disgruntled women who haven't seen their husband in 6 months, it can be cataclysmic.
Running an FRG meeting can be equated to herding cats in heat, who have been dunked in a bathtub. No matter what the issue, the problem is somehow the fault of the FRG leader. She apparently wears an invisible cape, is intended to fly at lightning speed, and willing to fight all of the worlds evils.
The FRG is a necessity, but it is only as good as you make it. Keep in mind, it is a volunteer position. If one thinks they can be the next Claudia Joy, they are typically more than welcome to make an attempt.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Military Housing Is Not FREE.
I was recently told by an "internet military expert" how military families have it so wonderful. That we don't have to worry about trivial things such as housing, utilities and general safety because we have it provided for us. How all we have to do, is send our spouses into a recruiters office and its easy street for the rest of our lives.
Now those of us reading this, who are living the military lifestyle, are most likely either rolling their eyes or laughing right now.
Yes, we are provided housing or a Basic Housing Allowance.
But, lets break this down.
According to the Military Pay Chart a Pvt, will earn $1447 a month. Given the hours of a typical work schedule, or $723 every 2 wks.
A soldier does not work a 8,10 or 12 hour work day. Several days a week it is a 24 hr shift (during non-war time) which makes their pay as low as 8.00/hr.
Now assume this same soldier has a family. So he must have a home.
Assume rent is on the conservative side of $800/month. Utilities maybe $150 (assuming no cell phone and they work very hard at energy conservation. He must have a car to go back and forth to work immediately as he is always on call. So lets say a conservative $400/month for car payment. Lets add in insurance, car-$100/month, renters $30/ month (assuming he has a good driving record)
Lets say he has the perfect nuclear family. A wife and 2 kids. They must eat.
Lets assume, they ration their meals. We'll say $500/ month for groceries.
We'll add another $100/month gas, incidentals. Then lets not forget all military needs. Uniforms, patches, boots, functions etc..so we'll add a min $50/month.
So we started at $1447, we are now at a NEGATIVE 683 DOLLARS.
Here you have a soldier, who works 24 hrs a day and nets a -683. Sounds like a good trade for your freedom, right?
Now, take away the housing expenses, which will be covered under BAH. BAH varies from area to area. Where I am BAH for a PVT is $864. Which still does not cover the cost of living. Assuming rent, utilities, insurance, groceries are as previously stipulated that is $1480. Which means that private WITH housing allotment is netting a whopping NEGATIVE 33 dollars.
Now lets assume instead of the BAH option, this soldier decides to live in military housing. After waiting 1-12 months for a home he is granted one. He has 2 children, so he will (depending on the sex/age of children and post) only be alloted a 2 bedroom home. Typically an apartment style. Some of these homes the interior cannot be painted, or anything hung on walls. We grow accustomed to the traditional Army Housing White.
If something breaks, leaks or quits working, we may wait on a list for weeks before it can be repaired. This includes some safety issues, such as broken locks.
The majority of Army Housing predates WW2, so you can imagine how drafty they can be. Which increases our utilities, which we are now accountable for.
So even living in military housing that same PVT ends up netting a NEGATIVE amount.
So I would like for one of these "military experts" to tell me, how making approx. $8.00/ hr, to possibly give your life does not warrant a little help in the housing area?
These men/women work for meager wages, live in unacceptable conditions and fight so others don't have to.
You don't have to like our military, but the least you can do is respect what they do for you.
Now those of us reading this, who are living the military lifestyle, are most likely either rolling their eyes or laughing right now.
Yes, we are provided housing or a Basic Housing Allowance.
But, lets break this down.
According to the Military Pay Chart a Pvt, will earn $1447 a month. Given the hours of a typical work schedule, or $723 every 2 wks.
A soldier does not work a 8,10 or 12 hour work day. Several days a week it is a 24 hr shift (during non-war time) which makes their pay as low as 8.00/hr.
Now assume this same soldier has a family. So he must have a home.
Assume rent is on the conservative side of $800/month. Utilities maybe $150 (assuming no cell phone and they work very hard at energy conservation. He must have a car to go back and forth to work immediately as he is always on call. So lets say a conservative $400/month for car payment. Lets add in insurance, car-$100/month, renters $30/ month (assuming he has a good driving record)
Lets say he has the perfect nuclear family. A wife and 2 kids. They must eat.
Lets assume, they ration their meals. We'll say $500/ month for groceries.
We'll add another $100/month gas, incidentals. Then lets not forget all military needs. Uniforms, patches, boots, functions etc..so we'll add a min $50/month.
So we started at $1447, we are now at a NEGATIVE 683 DOLLARS.
Here you have a soldier, who works 24 hrs a day and nets a -683. Sounds like a good trade for your freedom, right?
Now, take away the housing expenses, which will be covered under BAH. BAH varies from area to area. Where I am BAH for a PVT is $864. Which still does not cover the cost of living. Assuming rent, utilities, insurance, groceries are as previously stipulated that is $1480. Which means that private WITH housing allotment is netting a whopping NEGATIVE 33 dollars.
Now lets assume instead of the BAH option, this soldier decides to live in military housing. After waiting 1-12 months for a home he is granted one. He has 2 children, so he will (depending on the sex/age of children and post) only be alloted a 2 bedroom home. Typically an apartment style. Some of these homes the interior cannot be painted, or anything hung on walls. We grow accustomed to the traditional Army Housing White.
If something breaks, leaks or quits working, we may wait on a list for weeks before it can be repaired. This includes some safety issues, such as broken locks.
The majority of Army Housing predates WW2, so you can imagine how drafty they can be. Which increases our utilities, which we are now accountable for.
So even living in military housing that same PVT ends up netting a NEGATIVE amount.
So I would like for one of these "military experts" to tell me, how making approx. $8.00/ hr, to possibly give your life does not warrant a little help in the housing area?
These men/women work for meager wages, live in unacceptable conditions and fight so others don't have to.
You don't have to like our military, but the least you can do is respect what they do for you.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
They're called Army Brats for a reason!
One may wonder the origin of the term "Army Brat". When a child of the military is introduced, it is almost always followed by the statement "he/she is an Army Brat". For generalization purposes, it is to mean simply the child of a soldier. Those in the military who have children however, know all too well what that term entails.
Army brats, have to deal with a lot at an early age. They cope with mom/dad in and out of their lives on a regular basis. It is nothing for a child to go 6 months to a year without seeing their parent. Then for 2 whole glorious weeks, its nothing but parental interaction. This can be confusing for our children. Our sons attempt to fulfill the father roles, only to have it taken away once their father returns home. Our daughters, get used to answering to mom only. So when daddy gets home, they may face a feeling of resentment.
The first time my husband deployed to Iraq, I was 8 months pregnant with our first child. A year went by, he was on his way home, only to be turned around after being notified of an extension. By the time he finally came home, and seen his child she was 15 months old.
I'll never forget that first night home. It was bedtime, she kisses me goodnight, takes Daddy's hand....and walks him to the front door. She was going to bed, so he needed to go home. She stood there at the front door with a bewildered look on her face as I attempted to explain that this stranger was going to be with us forever.
In just one evening, she went from being mommy's one and only, to sharing mommy and living with a virtual stranger.
Since this occurrence, she has had to repeat this cycle 2 more times all before the age of 6. People will say bad things about Army Brats, and maybe some of it is warranted. Our children may occassionally act out, and they may not be perfect all the time. However, I would like to see any child, deal with half of the issues an "Army Brat" deals with in a given week, and come out half as wonderful.
Army brats, have to deal with a lot at an early age. They cope with mom/dad in and out of their lives on a regular basis. It is nothing for a child to go 6 months to a year without seeing their parent. Then for 2 whole glorious weeks, its nothing but parental interaction. This can be confusing for our children. Our sons attempt to fulfill the father roles, only to have it taken away once their father returns home. Our daughters, get used to answering to mom only. So when daddy gets home, they may face a feeling of resentment.
The first time my husband deployed to Iraq, I was 8 months pregnant with our first child. A year went by, he was on his way home, only to be turned around after being notified of an extension. By the time he finally came home, and seen his child she was 15 months old.
I'll never forget that first night home. It was bedtime, she kisses me goodnight, takes Daddy's hand....and walks him to the front door. She was going to bed, so he needed to go home. She stood there at the front door with a bewildered look on her face as I attempted to explain that this stranger was going to be with us forever.
In just one evening, she went from being mommy's one and only, to sharing mommy and living with a virtual stranger.
Since this occurrence, she has had to repeat this cycle 2 more times all before the age of 6. People will say bad things about Army Brats, and maybe some of it is warranted. Our children may occassionally act out, and they may not be perfect all the time. However, I would like to see any child, deal with half of the issues an "Army Brat" deals with in a given week, and come out half as wonderful.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Family Separation
One of the biggest pitfalls of Army life, is the seperation from your family. Its rare that your soldier would be stationed in the same state as your family, let alone with in a few hours drive. We are lucky to see our loved ones once a year. I would venture to say its an accepted norm among military living.
When we do see them, its usually for something unexpected or a last minute surprise.
There are close members of my own family, I may go years without seeing. With my youngest's upcoming ballet recital, my parents made the 8 hour journey.
I love my family, but after 2 days in military quarters, with 3 children, my parents 2 dogs, and my parents. You start to realize the value of valium.
You must understand my familial background to fully appreciate this statement. My parents were not pet lovers when I was growing up, to say the least. If we did have a pet, they had a nasty habit of disappearing. We didn't have the luxury of being told, "they went to live on a farm". Simply because, we lived on a farm, and therapy was expensive.
So to see my parents today, with their 2 maltese, hyperactive cottonball puppies toting them around, and taking them to little puppy day spa's, seems a bit odd.
First we start with Kiki. She's the oldest of the two. Not completely obnoxious, but I have made it my life's mission to color her white hair, purple. My father seems very offended by this quest, so I have agreed to use Kool-aid with the thought it may not be permanent. Still a no go. The perks of being involved with the military, however, means a dedication to developing my recon skills. After all, they have to sleep sometime.
Then we move to Coco. She's the baby. As psychotic as she is small, I can't help but think she'd be considered a delicacy in some countries. I have a stack of one rate APO shipping boxes, and I think I can have her in Korea before they notice she's missing.
Don't get me wrong. I love dogs. But the wake up calls at 3, 4, 5 and 6 am, seem to be taking its toll on my attitude. I have to admit the idea of a puppy catapult has crossed my mind.
Apparently, since all the children have left home, and my parents are nearing retirement, they have begun to care for these hell hounds to remove the Empty Nest feeling. As demon dog #2 was barking this morning, at whatever imaginary being was tormenting it, I overhear my mom. COCO, USE YOUR INSIDE VOICE!
This statement was only outdone, by my fathers. "Kiki, do you think its going to start raining?"
I find myself thinking...I hope my husband gets promoted soon. We will need the pay raise, for my parents new home, in Bellvue Mental Hospital. As it stands now, I have promised that, when it comes time, I will not send them to "live on the farm", but will put them in the best nursing home, foodstamps can afford.
When we do see them, its usually for something unexpected or a last minute surprise.
There are close members of my own family, I may go years without seeing. With my youngest's upcoming ballet recital, my parents made the 8 hour journey.
I love my family, but after 2 days in military quarters, with 3 children, my parents 2 dogs, and my parents. You start to realize the value of valium.
You must understand my familial background to fully appreciate this statement. My parents were not pet lovers when I was growing up, to say the least. If we did have a pet, they had a nasty habit of disappearing. We didn't have the luxury of being told, "they went to live on a farm". Simply because, we lived on a farm, and therapy was expensive.
So to see my parents today, with their 2 maltese, hyperactive cottonball puppies toting them around, and taking them to little puppy day spa's, seems a bit odd.
First we start with Kiki. She's the oldest of the two. Not completely obnoxious, but I have made it my life's mission to color her white hair, purple. My father seems very offended by this quest, so I have agreed to use Kool-aid with the thought it may not be permanent. Still a no go. The perks of being involved with the military, however, means a dedication to developing my recon skills. After all, they have to sleep sometime.
Then we move to Coco. She's the baby. As psychotic as she is small, I can't help but think she'd be considered a delicacy in some countries. I have a stack of one rate APO shipping boxes, and I think I can have her in Korea before they notice she's missing.
Don't get me wrong. I love dogs. But the wake up calls at 3, 4, 5 and 6 am, seem to be taking its toll on my attitude. I have to admit the idea of a puppy catapult has crossed my mind.
Apparently, since all the children have left home, and my parents are nearing retirement, they have begun to care for these hell hounds to remove the Empty Nest feeling. As demon dog #2 was barking this morning, at whatever imaginary being was tormenting it, I overhear my mom. COCO, USE YOUR INSIDE VOICE!
This statement was only outdone, by my fathers. "Kiki, do you think its going to start raining?"
I find myself thinking...I hope my husband gets promoted soon. We will need the pay raise, for my parents new home, in Bellvue Mental Hospital. As it stands now, I have promised that, when it comes time, I will not send them to "live on the farm", but will put them in the best nursing home, foodstamps can afford.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
But its on sale!
Anyone familiar with the military, is familiar with the payscale. Most of us live from payday to payday, praying that nothing big happens. We've almost all had to visit a "payday" loan company, or make a visit to the ACS office for assistance in making that last minute payment.
Few of us with children will qualify for WIC, and its rare that we are allowed govt. aid such as food stamps. I'm not saying we in the military are poor, by by any means, but maybe a bit underpaid.
So, when the occasional sale such as the Commissary Tent Sale arises, you can imagine the chaos that ensues. I like the rest, await this day, like Christmas.
Imagine if you will....Twas, the night before Tent sale, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse. The coupons all clipped, laid with care by the door, the sales ads all folded with good deals galore.
The wives are all snuggled, deep in their beds. Visions of chaos, danced through their heads. Mamma in her longjohns, me in my cap. We dreamed of the sales on all sorts of crap.
While out at the commissary, there rose such a clatter. The MPs they sprung to see whats the matter.
Away to their cop cars, their tanks and their hummers. The threw on their lights, their side arms and gunners.
When what to their wondering eyes should appear, but 8 little women all them cashiers.
On Dana, on Carol, on Patty and Jasmin. On Cathy, on Ming Lau, and Donna, and Brenda.
Slash away, slash away, slash away all!
One can imagine, how crazy a sale of this magnitude can be.
You arise to stand in line by 6 am. We wait for sometimes hours, so we can get one of the 10 hand carts available for tentsale use. We enter single file into a big tent, almost a feeling of fear as you enter into the unknown. The whispers that go down the line. Did you see that sale on Tide? No but I got the Gatorade.
The tent sale can be a place of fantasy, and romance for some. A place to form life long friendships over "which is a better deal, Kool Aid or Crystal Light". As we stood in line for over 2 hours, my 4 yr old son, pronouces his love for the girl ahead of us. It seems as they've known each other for a lifetime. (especially since I think I was still pregnant with him when we entered the tent)Right there in front of the Hamburger Helper, they wed. With all sale goers as witness'.
Nothing says love, like 2.99 a case.
Of all the tent sales in all of the world, she had to walk into his.
Few of us with children will qualify for WIC, and its rare that we are allowed govt. aid such as food stamps. I'm not saying we in the military are poor, by by any means, but maybe a bit underpaid.
So, when the occasional sale such as the Commissary Tent Sale arises, you can imagine the chaos that ensues. I like the rest, await this day, like Christmas.
Imagine if you will....Twas, the night before Tent sale, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse. The coupons all clipped, laid with care by the door, the sales ads all folded with good deals galore.
The wives are all snuggled, deep in their beds. Visions of chaos, danced through their heads. Mamma in her longjohns, me in my cap. We dreamed of the sales on all sorts of crap.
While out at the commissary, there rose such a clatter. The MPs they sprung to see whats the matter.
Away to their cop cars, their tanks and their hummers. The threw on their lights, their side arms and gunners.
When what to their wondering eyes should appear, but 8 little women all them cashiers.
On Dana, on Carol, on Patty and Jasmin. On Cathy, on Ming Lau, and Donna, and Brenda.
Slash away, slash away, slash away all!
One can imagine, how crazy a sale of this magnitude can be.
You arise to stand in line by 6 am. We wait for sometimes hours, so we can get one of the 10 hand carts available for tentsale use. We enter single file into a big tent, almost a feeling of fear as you enter into the unknown. The whispers that go down the line. Did you see that sale on Tide? No but I got the Gatorade.
The tent sale can be a place of fantasy, and romance for some. A place to form life long friendships over "which is a better deal, Kool Aid or Crystal Light". As we stood in line for over 2 hours, my 4 yr old son, pronouces his love for the girl ahead of us. It seems as they've known each other for a lifetime. (especially since I think I was still pregnant with him when we entered the tent)Right there in front of the Hamburger Helper, they wed. With all sale goers as witness'.
Nothing says love, like 2.99 a case.
Of all the tent sales in all of the world, she had to walk into his.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
For one to see the difference in Army wives, you need not go further than your local Army Community Hospital. Anyone, who's ever been to the Dr. on post can most likely relate to what I'm about to say. Lets start at the front desk...typically, there are about 3 receptionist's. One seems to almost always be a male, who left the Army for a civilian position. Then you have the 2 left-over females. Almost, inevitably an Army wife. You have the older lady, most likely a spouse of a retiree. She's sweet, but seems to be easily confused. Then we have receptionist #2. She's the straight laced, organized one. Always the professional.
Then we look beyond the desk, into the background, to the young wife. Barely 21 on a conservative note. Appears to be working as a CNA or something of that nature. However, she's in a belly shirt and blue jeans. So, we move on to the medical assistant, tattooed from head to toe. Piercings that may or may not stun the rest of the world, and you just know she has a lot of fun with that prescription pad.
So on that note,we go back to the lobby, and peruse the ladies in waiting....
We have wife #1, she's the Germophobe. Constitantly pulling out the wet wipes and the hand sanitizer. (I find myself wondering how much she's inhaling). Her kid politely asks for a "healthy" snack. (yes they actually ask in this manner, sickening isn't it, lol). All is well until her child drops a piece onto the floor. You would assume someone had just entered into a hostage negotiation with her reaction. PUT IT DOWN...GIVE IT TO MOMMY AND STEP AWAY. MOMMY HAS GOT THIS!
Wife #2, however is more of the opposite. She's the one, who it appears hasn't had a decent shower, since her first child was born 5 yrs ago. She's got 4 kids, pregnant with the next. All barely a year apart. The kids are jumping on furniture, yelling, cursing and acting like little "angels" she choses to ignore. By little "angels", I'm referring to Satan.
Wife #3, she's the no-nonsense, I don't care who's looking, I will beat my kids and teach everybody a few new words while doing so.
Wife #4, this is the one we call the party girl. No matter where she is, she's fabulous. Tight leopard print pants, off the shoulder 1980s remake T, high heels and hoop earrings you can put your feet through. Spends all of her waiting room time, catching up on those necessary text messages or emergency phone calls. For some reason, we all need to know about Renee and her man problems. If I hear the phrase "girl.. dontchu know dats right" one more time, those hoop earrings will be around her neck.
Then I dare to call the remaining families nearly normal. I'm not saying they don't have their quirks, but atleast they don't show them in the Dr's office.
You never know what you will encounter on an Army post.
Just today, I stopped at the pharmacy. All seems normal at first glance. But then you look a few doors down. Only on an Army Post will you see a liquor store tent sale up to 50 % off, outside of a pharmacy. I'm not sure this seems odd to others, but for some reason selling Jose Cuervo to someone who's just picked up their prescription for Lithium seems wrong.
Oh, but it gets better...free samples! On a Wednesday afternoon, its comforting to know, I can try the newest flavors of Smirnoff, before driving home with my children in the car.
Like I said, Army life is complicated lol.
Then we look beyond the desk, into the background, to the young wife. Barely 21 on a conservative note. Appears to be working as a CNA or something of that nature. However, she's in a belly shirt and blue jeans. So, we move on to the medical assistant, tattooed from head to toe. Piercings that may or may not stun the rest of the world, and you just know she has a lot of fun with that prescription pad.
So on that note,we go back to the lobby, and peruse the ladies in waiting....
We have wife #1, she's the Germophobe. Constitantly pulling out the wet wipes and the hand sanitizer. (I find myself wondering how much she's inhaling). Her kid politely asks for a "healthy" snack. (yes they actually ask in this manner, sickening isn't it, lol). All is well until her child drops a piece onto the floor. You would assume someone had just entered into a hostage negotiation with her reaction. PUT IT DOWN...GIVE IT TO MOMMY AND STEP AWAY. MOMMY HAS GOT THIS!
Wife #2, however is more of the opposite. She's the one, who it appears hasn't had a decent shower, since her first child was born 5 yrs ago. She's got 4 kids, pregnant with the next. All barely a year apart. The kids are jumping on furniture, yelling, cursing and acting like little "angels" she choses to ignore. By little "angels", I'm referring to Satan.
Wife #3, she's the no-nonsense, I don't care who's looking, I will beat my kids and teach everybody a few new words while doing so.
Wife #4, this is the one we call the party girl. No matter where she is, she's fabulous. Tight leopard print pants, off the shoulder 1980s remake T, high heels and hoop earrings you can put your feet through. Spends all of her waiting room time, catching up on those necessary text messages or emergency phone calls. For some reason, we all need to know about Renee and her man problems. If I hear the phrase "girl.. dontchu know dats right" one more time, those hoop earrings will be around her neck.
Then I dare to call the remaining families nearly normal. I'm not saying they don't have their quirks, but atleast they don't show them in the Dr's office.
You never know what you will encounter on an Army post.
Just today, I stopped at the pharmacy. All seems normal at first glance. But then you look a few doors down. Only on an Army Post will you see a liquor store tent sale up to 50 % off, outside of a pharmacy. I'm not sure this seems odd to others, but for some reason selling Jose Cuervo to someone who's just picked up their prescription for Lithium seems wrong.
Oh, but it gets better...free samples! On a Wednesday afternoon, its comforting to know, I can try the newest flavors of Smirnoff, before driving home with my children in the car.
Like I said, Army life is complicated lol.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
All About Me!
First, lets start with an introduction. My name is Chrissy, I am an Army wife and mother of 3 children. Two girls and a boy, ages 2,4, and 6. My husband is on his 3rd deployment, currently to Afghanistan.
Army life is not what you watch on television or old movies. We don't all sit around and hold hands, get excited about the upcoming FRG meetings, go to regular coffee/tea socials, or wear fancy ballgowns once a week. When we fight with our soldiers, they don't come into our work, sweep us off our feet and carry us out with beautiful background music.
Being an Army wife is hard, dirty and complicated. But do not take my statement as a need for sympathy.
We knew the life we married into, and we did it willfully. You'll see as we go on, exactly what I mean by this.
Now, to lump all Army wives into one, is impossible. We are nothing alike, if anything, our indifference is what bonds us. We live a life, no one can understand unless you've been a part of it.
I don't believe its more difficult, than a civilian life, if you have the right mindset. I don't believe in the "I don't know how you do it, you must be so strong" approach. Again, we knew what we married. We don't need pity.
Reminding us how much our life sucks, really doesn't help.
We say goodbye to our husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, children on a regular basis. If we haven't gotten good at it by now, we probably don't have much hope.
Now this is the background of my ideals. I'll be the first one to tell you, I am rarely this serious. But I feel it is necessary info. to know where I am coming from.
As the days go on, I plan to give you a more indepth, mostly comical approach to Army Life. I am far from Politically Correct. I am what you call an "Equal Opportunity Bigot". I dislike everyone equally.
Stay tuned....more to come!
Army life is not what you watch on television or old movies. We don't all sit around and hold hands, get excited about the upcoming FRG meetings, go to regular coffee/tea socials, or wear fancy ballgowns once a week. When we fight with our soldiers, they don't come into our work, sweep us off our feet and carry us out with beautiful background music.
Being an Army wife is hard, dirty and complicated. But do not take my statement as a need for sympathy.
We knew the life we married into, and we did it willfully. You'll see as we go on, exactly what I mean by this.
Now, to lump all Army wives into one, is impossible. We are nothing alike, if anything, our indifference is what bonds us. We live a life, no one can understand unless you've been a part of it.
I don't believe its more difficult, than a civilian life, if you have the right mindset. I don't believe in the "I don't know how you do it, you must be so strong" approach. Again, we knew what we married. We don't need pity.
Reminding us how much our life sucks, really doesn't help.
We say goodbye to our husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, children on a regular basis. If we haven't gotten good at it by now, we probably don't have much hope.
Now this is the background of my ideals. I'll be the first one to tell you, I am rarely this serious. But I feel it is necessary info. to know where I am coming from.
As the days go on, I plan to give you a more indepth, mostly comical approach to Army Life. I am far from Politically Correct. I am what you call an "Equal Opportunity Bigot". I dislike everyone equally.
Stay tuned....more to come!
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