Lets Get Physical!

One of the best things about living on or near an Army base is the plethra of gym membership opportunities. Depending upon the local gyms, you can do anything from Mixed Martial Arts to Pole Dancing. (I hesitate to take this class, I figure if I was any good at it, I couldn't fight the urge to make some money off it. The stage name Stretchmark Sally has a nice ring, lol)

So, in light of my current health debacle, I thought it wouldn't hurt to break out the spandex. Well, it wouldn't hurt me, but the rest of you might not appreciate it.
So with the spandex where it belongs in the dumpster, I join the On Post gym.

They have a variety of options there as well. I have attempted almost all of the classes by now. I like the rest of the world have joined the Zumba craze. Now my taking of this class will vary by daily teachers. Not out of dislike for any of them, just out of my lack of coordination. I have long accepted that some stereotypes apply to me. Hence, I am a white girl and I still clap and snap my fingers, and bob my head when I dance. Its sad, but its who I am :(
I actually had one girl interrupt me just when I was in my groove, so she could ask me..."um..yeah you know thats the instructor up there right?" I'm guessing she didn't understand how the rythym got me.

Aside from Zumba, I also take atleast a weekly, cycling class. I haven't riden a bike since I was about 12, so I was very concerned about this endeavor.
Week one: class wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Couldn't wait for next weeks class. Realize next day, my butt was bruised and I hate cycling.

Week two: Realized reason I made it through week one, because my tension knob wasn't working then but not to worry.....it's been fixed. DAMN IT! But it gets better. Half way through the class I'm peddling my little heart out, and my seat falls, with me on it. I think I handled it without any real attention being drawn and peddle on. But then it falls a little further, and LOUDLY. The best part was when class was interrupted to help me adjust my seat. Good thing that went unnoticed, huh? lol

Week three: I really think someone should add a camera to the bike seats. We could get our yearly colonoscopy while we peddle. I don't think I've ever let anybody get as friendly with me as that bike seat.

Then of course, we have Yoga. This is probably my favorite of the three. I'm terrible at it, downward facing dog seems to make me gassy (I'm sure the girl next to me appreciates that),and I always have to pee mid class. But the quiet meditation portion of the class gives me plenty of time to plot revenge on those who have wronged me :) I think because I am so busy during the day, I depend upon this time to work out my inner issues, lol. (yes I know thats not what I'm supposed to do and it defeats the purpose....do I need to add you to the list? lol jk)
But seriously I really do like Yoga. Once you've spent all day dancing, jumping, cycling, yoga is a great way to wind down and release some of that muscle cramping you know you are going to feel in the morning.

But my all time favorite gym activitie: The Sauna. Now most people will think its because I get a chance to be lazy...they're pretty much right. But there are several other personal benefits. I walk out of there sweaty and I automatically feel more comfortable being at the gym. I have a tendency to have a little anxiety when I go to the gym. You walk in being well...me. You see all these fit soldiers doing one handed pull ups, women who do nothing but run and eat seaweed it seems and its intimidating. So first stop is usually the sauna. Once you are in there for a few minutes, not only do you feel more comfortable and ready to go, but you get to start you gym visit with GOSSIP!! Maybe its being locked in a hot wooden box together but nobody can stand the silence. Men, women, enlisted, officers it doesn't matter.

So twice a day, you can find me getting physical at the on post gym. I suggest you look for the giddy female in the sauna, its probably me.

Dear Middle East...

I understand the desire to fight. I understand the desire for less government, and I can even to a point understand your various governments need to control the situations at hand. However, I am asking you as a personal favor to KNOCK IT OFF!

Yes I am a lowly American infidel. I understand how the request of a female will be automatically denied, but please take my request into consideration. I am desperately trying to get my husband out of the US Army. You are not helping!

I long for the days that my husband will no longer be sent to your region of the world, but for some reason you constantly insist he and his friends come back. Its getting kind of old. Now I knew when I married him, there was a possibility I would have to share him with the rest of the world. However, I think you are being a little selfish with his limited time. He has a wife and 3 kids who miss him as well. He really doesn't need a group of bastard children who insist on throwing temper tantrums.

I think the appropriate course of action right now is a Time Out. I suggest you all go to your palaces and think about what you have done. If they have to pull the tanks over you are gonna regret this mister! Don't make them come back there!!!
They've already called Nana (sorry I meant NATO) and they know how you are acting. So don't expect NATO to come to your rescue.

See you say you want the Americans to stay out of your business. Yet, you won't let us. The guys/girls really don't want to be there. But you leave them no choice.

Here, I (as well as thousands of others), are trying to get our husbands to retire or move on to greener pastures. They would be out of your turbans for ever. But, that cannot happen if you keep killing your own people. Do you see the problem here?

You are killing your people and replacing them with ours, who in turn will be forced to kill/injure more of your people? Thats not a good way to keep your country populated! If you kill off all of your people then who will you control?

See so it's in your best interest, that for the time being, you stop and let these soldiers go on their way.

Sincerly

US Army Wives

What Happened To Honor?

I know its been a while since I posted, but I feel like tonight I really need to get upon the soap box. My question to the world today? What happened to honor? duty? integrity? Or just being a decent human being?

Now I know everyone's version of "decent" varies, but I think we can all agree one should not go out of their way to hurt another for their own personal satisfaction or gain? By hurt, of course could mean a variety of different things. So I will leave that to your imagination.

When I first came into Army life, the standards were high. You screwed up, you were out. You cheated on your wife, your rear belonged to the Army. You beat your kids, failed to pay child support, or abandoned them you went to jail or faced serious consequences. You drank too much or did drugs you got help or left the Army. DWI's... there were NEVER more than one while you were in the Army. The wives watced their kids. The houses were never trashed and the lawns were always clean.

So my question is what happened? My first thought is maybe after 9/11 when there was an increased need for soldiers and everybody wanted a little payback, maybe our "selection" process slacked a little. Maybe we started overlooking little issues and before you know it, those little issues snowballed.

Maybe its like this all over and I've just been to naive to see it until now.

How is it that a nation with one of the strongest Army's in the world with the highest of moral standards, has turned into what we see before us today?

Just in one day, You can see a soldier leaving his family for another female. You see multiple wives neglecting their children. You see trashed homes, and disgusting yards. You see wives doing things that make me want to lie about being associated with them. You hear about how soldiers have gotten 2-3 DWI's and nothing is being done. You hear how another soldier has gotten drunk and killed an entire family. You hear about how we should be sensitive to these soldiers because they may have PTSD.

I've made my feelings about PTSD very well known. There were wars before Iraq and Afghanistan and it was never ok for those soldiers to get away with this, so why is it ok now?

Ghandi said, "be the change you want to see in the world". I can't imagine anyone set out to make these kinds of changes.

I put this question before all military wives, family members and soldiers reading my blog...what happened?

Miss Understood-Zoo Troop

I find it funny the impression outsiders have of Army Wives, specifically in time of war. For some reason, people on the outside have the idea that we are overly conservative women, who automatically dislike all members of society who are not white Christian males. We hold the entire Muslim community accountable for the deployment of our soldiers and we are all pearl necklace while we vacuum housewives.

All I can say about this...ARE ALL CIVILIANS ON CRACK?

For example: Somebody asked me about my husband, while a MUSLIM (lol) was in the room. I simply stated, he was deployed (no big deal right?). I can't believe atleast one person in the room didn't get whiplash as they turned to guage the reaction of the Muslim male to Army wife ratio. All the sudden, awkward silence took over the room.

I will say this once WE DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYBODY'S RELIGION, RACE, CREED, HEIGHT, ORIENTATION, COLOR, OR EVEN MENTAL STATUS any more than the random person.

We don't blame the Muslim community for the war, any more than we blame Westboro Baptist church for IEDs.

Now just to get a better idea of REAL Army wives in general, I am going to use my immediate group as a reference. In my little world, there are a group of women who have supported each other through this last deployment. We have lovingly coined the name ZOO TROOP.
All names have been changed to protect their identity! :)

Hotlips: OBAMA SUPPORTER! lol But we don't hold that against her. We still call her leader. Even though we give her a lot of crap sometimes, I would trust her with just about anything.

Braveheart: Married to a Lebanese American. We've promised her several times he is not a terrorist, although she has her doubts (just kidding don't call the FBI!)She's had it pretty rough this deployment, but she's managed to give her problems the finger and soldier on.

Sugar: The tattooed, pierced girl, who you would expect at first glance to be the trouble maker. LMAO! In all honesty, she's probably the last one of us to ever cause a scene. If any of us are going to get into heaven, its probably gonna be her. The idea of seeing her lose her temper is kinda funny once you get to know her.

Candy: She's the newest of the Army wife community. She hasn't been corrupted by Army life just yet. We're trying to ease her into the reality of this world. Once we find one we like, we try to hold on to them for as long as we can. She is still her own person, and I'm pretty sure she could drink every soldier on post under the bar, and probably win a few bets in the process.

Scrappy: Now Scrappy is the one who defies all Army wife stereotypes. She's the youngest of the group, so we're holding out a lot of hope for her. Anyone who believes any of the above mentioned ideas regarding Army wives should meet Scrappy.
She is the Irish decendant of a Jewish Mother and a Muslim Father. Yet...She is Catholic (I'm still trying to wrap my mind around this one). She is a independant female who takes very little crap from anyone. She teaches ballet, and then climbs up the side of a cliff like a damn spider monkey. She sings in the choir, and has an impressive collection of weaponry. If I could talk her into adopting a black, Chinese, Hari Krishna..I'm convinced she could take over the world.

Then there is me. I feel like I am the original Miss Understood sometimes. I have a tendency to be vocal. I have yet to master the ability to filter my thoughts on the short journey from brain to mouth. I make random jokes and stupid comments, and at first glance I can see where someone may take offense to some of the crap I say. IF THEY WERE AN OVERSENSITVE TARD! lol (had to throw something offensive in there to prove my point)I am probably the least judgemental person on the planet. As long as you aren't bothering me or my immediate persons I could care less what you do. I HATE judgement of any kind.

We as Army wives are continuously misunderstood, and judged for what we are and are not. My hope is one day, one gets to know us and not the TV version.

PTSD

With the soldiers returning home, I've heard seemingly non-stop questions/statements about PTSD. Before I go to piss somebody off, let me just say that yes I believe that PTSD is REAL.

Now with that being said, I believe it is extremely over used as an excuse. Yes, these men and women have experienced traumatic life altering events. They will have issues that most of us could never begin to imagine. However..So has most of the world.

Our nation in particular has pushed the believe that only Combat Veterans are subject to Post Traumatic Stress. Therefore, they should be privy to certain acts that the rest of the world is not. Since the beginning of the war(s), I have heard countless stories of soldiers beating their wives, in some cases even committing murder and claiming PTSD was to blame. I have heard of soldiers beating their infant children and saying well its ok because I have PTSD. Drug addiction, alcoholism, theft. NONE OF THIS IS OK, EVEN WITH PTSD.

In our country alone it is estimated that nearly 40 percent of CHILDREN have been diagnosed with PTSD. Our biggest contributor the PTSD in this country is Rape. But do these children or raped women get to go around and make excuses for their behavior by saying its ok "I have PTSD". Perhaps the best example of PTSD that comes to my mind, is Aileen Wuornos. She was still executed for her crimes.

Being a solider does not get you off the hook. You signed the paperwork to enlist freely. Knowing what you would see. The other victims didn't have a choice.

Soldiers are and should be held to a higher standard. You don't get to claim PTSD and do what you want. It just doesn't work that way. You still know what you are doing, when you do it. If you can't see the difference then do us all a favor and leave the US Army. Our country doesn't need people who can't take responsibility for their own actions.

It's A Wrap!

It has been a long, tough year but it has come to a wrap for most of us. I wish I could say we all escaped unscathed but unfortunately thats never the case.

My husband has been home for about 3 weeks now. The others are slowly filtering in. With any luck and the grace of GOD the rest of us will have our soldiers shortly.

Being an Army wife is tough. But we have got to be tougher. I will be the first to admit, that I have my moments where I just want to cave. Deployments are hard. But what I find to be the absolutely hardest part, is when they return.

Don't get me wrong. I am not an advocate of war. I don't want our soldiers to sacrifice anything more than absolutely necessary. I would be thrilled to know that there will be no more war and we can all live in our happy huts for the rest of eternity. I'm just saying that the adjustments to them coming home can be intense.

Now to keep myself out of marital trouble for the time being, lol, I will say its gone pretty well this last few weeks. I have finally had a chance to sleep in, I got a spa day and I've even gotten breakfast in bed! So do not take anything I am about to say as anything derogatory towards my own soldier or anyones for that matter.

Living this life, one becomes all to familiar, all too quickly with the issues one will face upon re-deployment. We as wives are told we must be "strong". We must handle everything on our own and smile while doing it. (that rarely happens)
We become adept at being a superhero and perfecting the balancing act, that when our partner returns we have to learn how to balance all over again. We go from being the one and only in control. To sharing responsibilities. Whether it be with the children or paying bills its a balancing act. We have been able to come and go as we please, to having to check in before we run to the shoppette. Its a huge adjustment. So you have to give yourselves time. Lots of time. It takes about 2 months in my house before we start to feel normal. The kids need that period of adjustment to realize there is another sheriff in town. The wife needs that time to learn how to depend on the other half.

Which brings me to the soldier. The biggest problem I've seen among married soldiers in regards to their family isn't the well publicized PTSD. But its that expectation that life will be the same as they left it. They come home and quickly realize, the world kept revolving and changing while they were gone. They may have left behind a mousy, dependant wife with a toddler. But came home to a self-sufficient, strong, independent female and a nearly grown child. We aren't the same women you leave behind. We change. We grow. We adapt.

Now in regards to the soldier, we wives have also got to learn to be non-judgemental and patient. The fact is, these soldiers are coming home from a warzone. Bad things happen. Those bad things will be carried with these men/women for the rest of their lives. We have got to be able to listen and not judge. We have got to be able to accept they may not sleep as well as we'd like. They have also been changed. Some for the better, some for the worse. Its a huge adjustment for them to go from being a soldier who has to kill for survival, to a husband who has to ensure the survival of his family.

We as Army wives have only begun to be strong. Its not called the toughest job in the ARMY for nothing.

The Fate Of The Free World Depends On......ME??

Since my solder has returned he has taken on the task of getting his wife into shape. Which in general I'll say may not be such a bad idea. However...I'm thinking he may not realize what he signed up for. Being stuck in a war torn country fighting the Taliban is nothing, compared to trying to get me to follow orders.

Apparently, you aren't "allowed" to eat a candy bar when you're on the elliptical? It is counter productive to stop at McDonalds on your way home from the gym? The gym employees frown upon you leaving mayonnaise smudges on the treadmill control panel, and stomping your feet yelling NOOOOOOOOO is obnoxious. Seriously, are we living in Nazi Germany now???!

But for my own curiosity, I decided to look up the military standards for my age/sex. Just to see where I "ranked" fitness wise as compared to our men and women in uniform. I have to say I was somewhat disturbed by what I found. I realized that with the exception of pushups (which I have absolutly no ability or coordination for whatsoever), I was able to master the PT test. Now on any other chart, I would be thrilled that I could meet these standards. But this isn't any other chart. The part that I found disturbing, is if I can do it, maybe...it should be re-evaluated.

Now I'm not knocking the test or military standards in general. I'm just saying that maybe, the fate of the free world shouldn't rest upon people like me. Sure its possible that I'm just not giving myself enough credit....but its doubtful.

In the past few years, I have become for a lack of a better term, useless. I'm a big sissy. I want my sleep, I want to be left alone, and I really don't want to exercise. There are times, I need a nap just thinking about the walk to the bathroom. If the drive to the commissary weren't so much work, I'd probably just use Depends.

So I can just imagine people like me in a warzone. I would be that soldier, selling enemy secrets for cheeseburger. "hey Mr. Taliban, there are a bunch of soldiers behind that boulder now what do you have to eat?". Capturing someone like me would be easy. They'd probably do it while I was napping. They wouldn't really have to torture me for info. Just keep me up past my bedtime, I'd tell them whatever they wanted to know.

In all honesty, I don't really think that I'm lazy. Just obstinate. I have this inability to take orders. Apparently I have "authority" issues. I don't mind doing something, as long as I'm not TOLD to do it. I'm kind of like a toddler that way. Maybe if I weren't told to run and someone just dangled a snickers bar on a stick infront of the treadmill life might be easier for all.