Since my solder has returned he has taken on the task of getting his wife into shape. Which in general I'll say may not be such a bad idea. However...I'm thinking he may not realize what he signed up for. Being stuck in a war torn country fighting the Taliban is nothing, compared to trying to get me to follow orders.
Apparently, you aren't "allowed" to eat a candy bar when you're on the elliptical? It is counter productive to stop at McDonalds on your way home from the gym? The gym employees frown upon you leaving mayonnaise smudges on the treadmill control panel, and stomping your feet yelling NOOOOOOOOO is obnoxious. Seriously, are we living in Nazi Germany now???!
But for my own curiosity, I decided to look up the military standards for my age/sex. Just to see where I "ranked" fitness wise as compared to our men and women in uniform. I have to say I was somewhat disturbed by what I found. I realized that with the exception of pushups (which I have absolutly no ability or coordination for whatsoever), I was able to master the PT test. Now on any other chart, I would be thrilled that I could meet these standards. But this isn't any other chart. The part that I found disturbing, is if I can do it, maybe...it should be re-evaluated.
Now I'm not knocking the test or military standards in general. I'm just saying that maybe, the fate of the free world shouldn't rest upon people like me. Sure its possible that I'm just not giving myself enough credit....but its doubtful.
In the past few years, I have become for a lack of a better term, useless. I'm a big sissy. I want my sleep, I want to be left alone, and I really don't want to exercise. There are times, I need a nap just thinking about the walk to the bathroom. If the drive to the commissary weren't so much work, I'd probably just use Depends.
So I can just imagine people like me in a warzone. I would be that soldier, selling enemy secrets for cheeseburger. "hey Mr. Taliban, there are a bunch of soldiers behind that boulder now what do you have to eat?". Capturing someone like me would be easy. They'd probably do it while I was napping. They wouldn't really have to torture me for info. Just keep me up past my bedtime, I'd tell them whatever they wanted to know.
In all honesty, I don't really think that I'm lazy. Just obstinate. I have this inability to take orders. Apparently I have "authority" issues. I don't mind doing something, as long as I'm not TOLD to do it. I'm kind of like a toddler that way. Maybe if I weren't told to run and someone just dangled a snickers bar on a stick infront of the treadmill life might be easier for all.
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